Freaking Fabulous Friday

So today was something else. I’ve never really done this before, describe my day and all but I just felt like doing it, so here goes. I left home around 8:30am to go to Yaba. The Northeast trade wind mocked me while I was walking, that was really annoying cos I couldn’t mock it too. So, before I got to the estate gate, my black trouser, my shoes and my poor feet were white, say hello to dust. I just took out my handkerchief and cleaned myself up, what else would I do. My journey to Yaba was to see a family friend, I initially boarded a minivan but the driver decided he wanted to drive a bus, so we all got into the other bus which didn’t load quickly. Trust Lagosians, they shouted at the driver a lot. A pretty lady kept saying ‘fuck’ and shouting in Yoruba. I just wanted to leave that place. Finally the bus moved. Some minutes later, I realized the person in front of me was a friend of mine from school and we chatted all the way. She is Anita, owner of houseofmuse, I think. She is a good designer. The bus driver remembered he had to buy fuel. Hehehe, see hissing in the bus. I just remembered I picture I had on my phone about Nigerians hissing when their driver wants to buy fuel. Getting to Yaba wasn’t difficult, seeing my family friend was worth it, I ate cakes, my love for cakes can’t be overemphasized.
 I had another journey to embark on. I was to meet up with another friend of mine at Surulere, not too far from Yaba. Getting to Surulere wasn’t so difficult, just that a keke guy decided to scam me of #50, no wahala, I’ve done new year for him. The Surulere mall isn’t as big as the Ikeja city mall but I almost got lost inside. Na wa oh. Finally I found my friend, Amara, by the way, she’s the brain behind “Amebo with Amacutiex”, it’s something you need to follow on instagram.
We saw Jumanji, it started like 20mins after the scheduled time and no popcorn cos people were too much. The wait was worth it. “Surulere” was really important here, the movie was awesome, by the way, “surulere” means patience. After the movie, we took a lot of pictures, the ones we were fighting karate, the ones were our lips were sexy, the ones were we acted normal, the ones our sparkling 32 were visible, we sha took pictures. Amara is a selfie freak. We looked for wallpaper for her video skits, they said 5 Sq metre was 7k, we took their office cards and disappeared. 7k kwa, just like that, please let her get home first. Finally, we parted ways, it was fun being with her. She said I was laughing anyhow in the cinema, why won’t I? I’ll say it again, the movie was awesome.
Now, going home was the difficult part, I needed serious “Surulere” here. First, getting keke to Ojuelegba wasn’t so easy but then I got one. I sat beside a lady who used nose mask, like nose masks used in hospitals during surgery or something to cover her nose. That was new for me, I don’t blame the woman, why will she come and kill herself because of dust and exhaust fumes in Lagos. My own nose was already blocked cos of catarrh, it was pointless trying to cover it. I looked on ahead and saw a church poster on another keke. It read “Rapturable seed ministry of God”. I didn’t go further to read. What kind of name of church is this one biko. Hian, there’s nothing I won’t see in Nigeria. It took my mind to one I saw in Portharcourt, “Godist church”. What does that even mean? Is Godist a word? OK oh, I didn’t say anything oh, let me just get to Ojuelegba. I forgot I was in Eko and it was already 6pm, traffic was going to be my companion for a long time. I got to Ojuelegba and the transport fare to Ogba was hiked. Typical Lagosians to increase transport fare once it’s late. And we were packed like sardines inside the bus. Sardines are even better now, they are no longer overcrowded, thanks to recession. My ass felt like akara been fried. I was tired ehn. So much for my freaking Fabulous Friday. But I wasn’t gonna let traffic ruin my mood. I started chatting and I uploaded my pictures joor. Finally, we got to Ogba. Agege was a no go area since our Governor was in love with building bridges. This made the ogba route blocked with traffic.
 There were a lot of people waiting to board a bus going to Obawole. When a bus finally came, it was war getting inside. I had to protect my glasses, 15k is not #10. So I after winning the fight, I got a seat oh. Thank God. Oya bus move na, the driver refused to move because a grown man was “lapping” a grown lady at the back. He said his tire will burst that they should come down. Omo, is it after hustling for seat you’ll tell me to come down, my guy and lady refused to come down oh. The argument went on for about 15mins with threats of slaps and beating being exchanged among the driver, the people and some other passengers. Guess what I was doing, you got it, chatting. Driver finally agreed after the two parties decided to beg instead of shout. Another young guy didn’t have enough money to board the bus so asked the driver if he could hang, like a conductor. He was granted the favor. But I felt sorry for him, through the traffic and stops, he kept hanging. Finally someone alighted and he could seat. Yayy! Before someone falls of a moving bus. An okada man almost hit a lady and she yelled in a very strange language. I had to laugh.
Meanwhile, my toes were numb in my shoes, I had to remove them to wriggle my beautiful toes. My journey was almost over when I looked outside the window and saw something, “Drink up, light up”. The bar Ish place was illuminated by beautiful club lights but looking a little further, I saw a church sign. Now do churches and bars share the same location? I wonder what is happening these days. Finally, I alighted and walked all the way home, got home around 9:30pm. In all, I really enjoyed my day, new experiences, old experiences, new things learned and fun. Besides, rice and stew was waiting for me. No need to worry about dinner. This is just a normal day in the hustle and bustle in Lagos.
So, how can you describe your day? I just did, hope I tried sha.
#Friday.
#Life of a Lagosian.
#Liv.